Corrupt a wish!

[pyro1082]

Granted, here comes a 7 mile long flaming ball of death, but wait it gets better it smells like spearmint. 

I wish I would stop laughing at people who can't speak English.

[Nebulosus]

Granted, you're now deaf and can't tell the difference.

I wish one of my senses was superhuman, and I could choose which one it is.

[Blacknight]

granted, but whichever you choose is so sharpened that it is torture whenever you use it.

i wish i wouldnt be so damn lazy.

[Nebulosus]

Granted, you are now a bee. If you act lazy you will be killed by your sisters, either way, no more lazyness.

I wish I was nocturnal.

[Link]

I don't have to grant that, you pretty much are anyways.

I wish for less zombie cats.

[pyro1082]

Granted but now there is more zombie mice. 

I wish for a arcade that looks like ibproarcade.

[Blacknight]

granted. but theres rotting corpses that fill up the volume of the arcade room and the games all short circuted

i wish id stop randomly morphing songs....

[Jekani]

You stop randomly morphing songs, but someone takes the job over for you anyways. You get depressed because they do a better job than you.

I wish people wouldn't call me when I am sleeping.

[Makaze]

granted, you get texts instead.
I wish I was in a better school.

[Jekani]

Granted, you move to the school on the other side of Greensboro.

I wish there was something in this house to eat.

[Makaze]

Granted.
It's Brian Dejesus's cootch.

[Nebulosus]

No wish ^^^

I wish I had a gunblade.

[Link]

Granted, but it's too small to do any significant damage.

I wish I had more hard drives.

[Nebulosus]

Granted, however we regret to inform you the contents of your hard drives may have been salvaged from the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean.

I wish I could light someone on fire without any negative legal action directed against me.

[Link]

Granted. However, with the lack of a justice system, the world takes to chaos and you are the first to die, therefore missing it all.

I wish I had a cheeseburger.